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The New Ones! Digital photos Of Thomas fill my machine. I'll make a web site! When you hired me, You promised me a villa. All I got was cube. He stops and ponders: Would Elvis hair look as good With my sparse blond 'stashe? Flowered shirt and wig For first day of the new job -- Hawaiian Elvis. Pre-Halloween thought: Tan suit worn for my job search. Need gold lame threads! What will we all do, When Thomas leaves the building? Time to celebrate! All that remains now Is cigarette pack and a coke can -- both empty. Restless like the wind Still smoking and eating junk Veritas is home Moving up and out Hawaiian shirts won't cut it Must buy new wardrobe Clean cut image good When climbing corporate ladder Hair plugs coming soon? What will Thomas do When new uptight company Wants him in at eight? Must eat healthy food Smoking is quite discouraged How will Thomas cope? have marlboro lights, western bacon cheeseburger ain't life wonderful? veritas at 8? thomas nowhere to be found. bedhead slumbers sound. his fine hair thinning, his midsection paunch spreading, yet just a big kid! First, production man, Then off to Engineering. In code, there is truth. New company now Must try to change my habits Can I still kill things? Tominator gone Quake not the same anymore Who will we frag now? Thomas playing Quake. Transforms to "Tominator". Oops. Now he is dead. Life without Dan Rush. How will Thomas ever survive? He will be lonely. Always with the smokes Lungs are black like the night sky Pray you don't get chased Oh plastic charge card, Buy me another plaid shirt. The chicks dig them all. Puff, puff, brrr, puff, puff, Just can't kick that old habit. Smoking while outside. I must change my name: Thomas Krafft no longer works, but Carl's Junior does. Look what Thomas did! He brought over Stan and Steve. Now we will all pay. Some things never change, Like the red leaves in autumn. You still suck at Quake! I am not Dan's bitch. I control my own fate here. "Yes, Dan, right away!" Tominator Kraft Giggles of delight from Quake Screen saver too loud. The Classics! one hair two hair three that's all on his lip i see no, it was just milk do you think if we water thomas' mustache it might just grow up? whats that in the sky? a bird? a plane? a mustache? ITS CARLS JR. MAN! sound of music shirt looks like deborah miller's dress we laugh everyday when will he buy us some toys like engineering i think i should quit. abe stages stuff wrong thomas huffs and puffs and whips out the lizard so cold in this place wrapped in his tan jacket pounds on his keyboard a bit of rogaine is all thomas needs to jump into adulthood a good manager he is not a big weenie now give me a raise a really swell guy mustache growing like a weed buy us photoshop Giving it more thought the shirt looks rather festive. Order our maglights GM21009660. is that a lizard? what a thing to see! my heart grows faint at the sight you people drive me crazy I don't know why I hired you you all can fu_ _ yoursel... you can't fire me cause today i quit again just like everyday One Two Three Four Five Seven Syllables Comes Next Buy Us Photoshop I wonder how soon I could update your Reviews you give me ulsers As soon as we get The last round of reviews back Lost with our maglights. a wise man once said all work and no play make for the dilbert award Don Ho he's not is that a mustache or just snot? Don't know which is worse Having Thomas for a boss or managing him Can't control his team A wise-ass at team meetings Fights with Engineers No maglights for us No cool bowling shirts for us Big scratch on Tom's car Will destroy the earth With the help of Mini Me Escape in starship. (that's the Carl's Jr. Starship) I'm backing Thomas You want your reviews so bad Get then without raises Now it is time to Send Hieku to the Big Boss Deborah is a weenie Good word choice Thomas. Hieku is japanese word For big fat loser. i think i'm safe; my first review is months away. he'll have forgotten then Forget he will not But you could bribe him with fries From Carl's Jr. Linda is on drugs Very wierd and very strong Please share with the team You can get them too Using your benefit plan Cost only 10 bucks! Linda is so cool not. But at least she's funny sort of. She does crack thomas cannot spell haiku ulcer is with a 'c', you flunked 7th grade engish we are getting mean I must stop this crap right now my Hieku blows chunks salangsang is pierced linda is the anti-christ kiss my ass louise if heiku means big fat loser, where does this guy blow chunks? how's that work? abe and i not on this list. that means more time for making good haikus what about the rest? Heather's face will turn bright red when she reads this mail Abe has altzheimer's always forgets the headers I will kick his ass Stan is too busy Getting hickies from his girl to QA projects my face may turn red but at least i can make my my face do something the only reason my face is turning red now is 'cuz i'm laughing I am a slave to the database. I can feel my lifeforce fading. Thomas, your webbies are humiliating you. why can't you see that? in the darkness I scream in vain. spiraling down into the silence someone help stan soon we might lose him forever then who will qa ?? (sorry lan) stan is cracking up! did someone check his litter tray? it kind of smells the haikus have stopped an era comes to a close work begins again the server is down is it time to go home yet it's almost beer : thirty With clipboard handy the access power user keeps us on schedule. (well, he used to before he became a traitor!) Now there's Emily Must go through Brian Gill now -- Keeping Sales at bay. Where did Thomas go? When he's gone we do no work. Damn. Yo yo just broke. Where is the project? Don't you know it's due today? Access tells no lies. with swift and snappy ideas at linda's finger- tips, no one is safe With T&C on his mind He'll make the fame and frame Welcome Mr. October! Need a favor dude sorry man, stick it in the db CLBDEMO How you torture the spirit! CLBDEMO wouldn't you know - C LBEDITORIAL is down - haiku time! The server is down Beer beer beer beer beer beer beer Beer beer beer beer beer haiku, haiku, why do I not understand you? you leave me confused Abe codes wrong header Thomas whips out big lizard Stan has big hickey flavia machine 8 ounces of hot liquid may you rest in peace. poor thomas, victim of technology. "i do webs"...but coffee? eh. eight ounces or twelve is the question that plagues us find flavia man! now gone from fatbrain i find that i miss thomas ha ha ha yea right. thomas' boyfriend i saw him early this morn wayne wayne wayne wayne wayne let's talk about training. and write poems. have a nice day, jessieh haiku: the perfect form for work humor; witty, brief, and relevant! i've got entire notebooks filled with bad haiku. it's why i bombed math. not to mention my shredded portfolio of cocktail napkins. |
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